June 2013
598 posts
The way US handles other countries
- US Government: So we heard you needed our help?
- Africa/The Middle East: No, we're fine.
- US Government: We really think you need our help.
- Africa/The Middle East: Fuck off, we're fine.
- US Government: Ah, they're hostile! They hate our way of life! We have to stop them!
- Africa/The Middle East: EVERYTHING WAS FINE UNTIL YOU GOT INVOLVED WHERE YOU'RE NOT WANTED.
- US Government: TERRORISTS! THEY'RE TRYING TO KILL ALL OF US! WE NEED TO INVADE!
you know how sometimes apples are just ok but then you bite into a really fresh juicy one and you’re like YOOOOOOOOO
It’s usually the yellow ones. You’re welcome.
Omfg I was sitting in a room with a bunch of my aunts, uncles and cousins and my grandma had this weird smile on her face so I asked her what was up and she just looked at me and said “everyone in this house is alive thanks to my vagina”
I literally JUST realized that as soon as I sit down to eat, I hear rihanna’s voice singing in my head “wheeeere have youuu beeennnn, ALL MY LIIIIIFFEEEE”
- Intro: yo dis my paper
- Body Paragraphs: *written beautifully along with correct spelling and grammar"
- Conclusion: dats it lol bye
“You deserve someone who would jump fences to be with you not someone who is on the fence about being with you.”
—Unknown (via aiiza)
pick up line: please
you could hit me with a car and i’d still say sorry
“And then my soul saw you and it kind of went, ‘Oh, there you are. I’ve been looking for you’.”
—Iain Thomas, I Wrote This For You (via de-licacy)
“Water is the softest thing, yet it can penetrate mountains and earth. This shows clearly the principle of softness overcoming hardness.”
—Lao Tzu (via erraticintrovert)
do u ever just make scenarios in your head that will never happen but makes you so happy so you just keep on imagining them
Marry someone who would only make you become closer to Allah.
shawty got low low low low low low low (self esteem)
“He is exactly
the poem
I wanted to write.” —Mary Oliver (via 400eurojob)
the poem
I wanted to write.” —Mary Oliver (via 400eurojob)
Culture has made haram what isn’t haram and halal what isn’t halal and made it harder to navigate the vast grey area between those ends of the spectrum and that is the root of way too many problems in our ummah.
- me during an exam: lol imma ace dis bitch
- me during an exam: the fuck did you just say
- me during an exam: alright focus
- me during an exam: pffffttt i got this
- me during an exam: I'M A GENIUS
- me during an exam: whats 5 x 8
- me during an exam: lol fuck this
- me during an exam: be our guest be our guest be our guest put our service to the test
- me during an exam: oh exam right
- me during an exam: yeah hear me flip that page
- me during an exam: i am better than all of you
- me during an exam: peasants
- me during an exam: what if everyone can read minds except me
- me during an exam: i bet theyre all thinking to each other 'dont tell her you can read minds'
- me during an exam: cough if you can hear me
- me during an exam: COUGH IF YOU CAN HEAR ME
- me during an exam: was i doing something
- me during an exam: right test okay
- me during an exam: lol i bet i can finish before this bitch
- me during an exam: did we learn this
- me during an exam: stop breathing so loud
- me during an exam: is that really necessary
- me during an exam: wow that post on tumblr last night is suddenly the funniest thing i have ever seen
- me during an exam: i will kill all of you
“Someday you’ll find the right person, and you’ll learn to have a lot more confidence in yourself. That’s what I think. So don’t settle for anything less. In this world, there are things you can only do alone, and things you can only do with somebody else. It’s important to combine the two in just the right amount.”
—Haruki Murakami (via eonianlife)
“The kind hearted make you feel as if you’ve known them for a lifetime even if you’ve met for the first time.”
—(via abdulbary)
